‘The Meditation Hall’

The Meditation Hall in Sri Ramanasramam in Tiruvannamalai has got a special place in the hearts of all the devotees of Bhagawan Sri Ramana Maharshi. It is a place which has got magical attraction. Bhagawan’s presence is felt in the Hall much more than any other place in the Ashram. This essay is based on my personal experiences. I re-count below the chain of events that has made this place so dear to my heart.

During my first visit to the Ashram 7 years ago, I had hardly heard the name of the Ashram. I happened to be in Tiruvannamalai on a private visit to see a relative. After going to the main temple, I went to Sri Ramanasramam to have a look of the Ashram and to know about it. I entered the meditation hall and saw the portrait of Bhagawan Sri Ramana Maharshi which was kept on a sofa. It was as if Bhagawan was sitting there and looking at the people who were coming into the hall. I prostrated at his portrait and sat in a corner of the hall. I got up after some time and went back to my place.

During my subsequent visit to the Ashram after 2 years, I had the opportunity to stay in the Ashram for a few days. After going around the Ashram I entered into the Meditation Hall and I saw Bhagawan’s devotees sitting in silence. Some were doing meditation and some were merely looking at the portrait of Sri Bhagawan.

I sat in a corner of the hall and made myself comfortable. I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate. After around 5 minutes, I opened my eyes and started observing the people sitting in the meditation hall. Some of them were in a state of deep trance and some were trying hard to concentrate. Some were looking at others like me.

I started to observe each one of them and wondered what exactly were they doing? “Are all these people really meditating?” I said to myself.

I tried to close my eyes again and tried to concentrate. But after around 5 minutes I opened my eyes. I, then wondered, ‘how can people sit in meditation for so long.’

The next morning I got up early and entered the meditation hall once again and sat again for doing meditation. This time, I said to myself ‘I will not open my eyes, come what may’. I started to look at the portrait of Sri Bhagawan. I was sitting just opposite to his portrait. I looked into his eyes and wondered whether Sri Bhagawan was looking at me? I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate.

This time too, I could not sit for more than half an hour. I got up and went back to the room. I was very upset about myself about not being able to sit in Dhyana for a long time. Then I asked to myself ‘Why have I come to the Ashram? Have I come here to escape my daily routine and forget my daily tensions? Have I come here to enjoy the peaceful and tranquil atmosphere of the Ashram or have I come here to enjoy the delicious food that is served? I could not find an answer.

For the next 2 days that I stayed in the Ashram, the same routine followed. I came back from the Ashram dejected. I then got engaged in my daily routine for the next three months.

Then again I came back to the Ashram for another stay of 3 days. During this time, I said to myself ‘I am going to sit longer hours in the meditation hall and would never get up until my legs tire’.

However, this was not to be and I was unsuccessful as I was during my first visit. This time too, I went back dejected and again I returned to the Ashram within 4 months. Similar questions and similar experiences followed during this visit also.

Visiting the Ashram became a habit for me. I tried to spend longer hours in the Meditation Hall. Most of the times I was unable to sit for more than half an hour. However the moment I used to get back to my work, the desire to return to the Ashram and sit in the Meditation Hall would arise. I used to ponder over this magnetic attraction of the Meditation Hall on me. ‘Why am I attracted to the Hall so much? Why do I come here so frequently?’ I used to ask myself.

The magnetic power of the Meditation Hall bewildered me. I gave me great pleasure to sit there and keep looking at the portrait of the Bhagawan.

During one of my visit to Tiruvannamalai on a ‘Pournami’ day, I was accompanied by 3 of my colleagues. After the Giripradakshina, we all went to the Ashram and sat in the meditation hall. I was very ecstatic as usual with the opportunity I got to sit in the meditation hall. After around half an hour, we all came out of the hall and the Ashram. Immediately, one of my colleagues, who had never visited the Ashram and did not knew anything about Sri Bhagawan, said that he had a great experience while sitting in the Meditation Hall. He immediately said ‘I have to come here again’.

The same was not the case with my 2 other colleagues. I was amused at this experience of my colleague. Why was it that my 2 other colleagues did not experience any thing in the Ashram. As they say, the grace of Sri Bhagawan is needed to understand his teachings.

I try to do Dhyana in my house also but my experience is never the same as it is in the Meditation Hall. I am unable to experience the same feeling in my house as I do in the Meditation Hall, although I have tried to recreate the same serene atmosphere in my room. The magnetic power that I experience in the Meditation hall seems to be missing in the room. There is something special about the Meditation Hall in the Ashram, I said to myself.

The rigors of the office routine used to take a toll on my thoughts about Ramanasramam. For a few days after I went back from the Ashram, I would keep thinking about the Meditation Hall and my experiences there. Later on slowly I would get busy in my routine and completely forget about it. Some days I never used to get time to go to my meditation room also. During some holidays I used to go my room and try to Dhyana but I could not experience the same calmness and the inner peace that I experience in the Meditation Hall.

In the month of June 2007, my eldest maternal uncle had passed away. I was in a state of deep shock at the unexpected turn of events. I decided to go Ramanasramam and spend some time. I went to Ramanasramam and stayed there for three days. One day, I was sitting in the Meditation Hall in a corner and trying to concentrate hard. I was sitting in such a place that I could see the portrait of Bhagawan the moment I opened my eyes. I closed my eyes and began to visualize the portrait of Bhagawan sitting in the sofa.

After some time, I saw a jyoti in front of my eyes. That jyoti was a small one to begin with. But after some time, it grew in size and it was so bright that I thought somebody had illuminated the entire room. The jyoti was shining brightly and it became bigger and bigger. After some time, I could see a chakra on top of this jyoti. This chakra was moving in a circular motion and slowly the speed of the chakra increased along with its size. The chakra became so big that now I could not see the jyoti that appeared initially. The chakra had various colors in it. As the size of the chakra increased, the various colors began to disappear one by one. The chakra became so big that it engulfed my entire vision and thoughts. After some time it began to fade away slowly. Later it completely went out of my vision. I was totally perplexed with this entire phenomenon. I opened my eyes out of curiosity and saw that everything around me was normal and calm as usual. Was it a dream or was it a divine light? Was it the grace of Bhagawan? I wondered.

I wanted to discuss this experience with my wife but kept quite because I thought she may shrug off this incident as an event of my own imagination... I did not discuss this with anybody. I wanted to believe that something miraculous had happened. My faith in the power of the Meditation Hall strengthened further.

Every time I step into the Meditation Hall, I can feel the grace and power of Shri Bhagawan and feel as if he is there, sitting in the sofa and looking at me, asking me to thrash out all doubts and thoughts and continue the quest for knowing the real ‘I’.